


Everything has changed (and now it's only you that matters)

by BellarmyBlake



Series: The SpierFeld Collection [2]
Category: Love Simon (2018), Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda - Becky Albertalli
Genre: Accident, Angst, Fluff, M/M, emergency contacts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-30
Updated: 2018-06-30
Packaged: 2019-05-31 11:21:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15118307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BellarmyBlake/pseuds/BellarmyBlake
Summary: Receiving a call from the hospital about a car crash victim is the scariest thing Simon has ever experienced. Finding out who it is is even worse.





	Everything has changed (and now it's only you that matters)

**Author's Note:**

> So I tried my hand at the angst stuff, which is not usually my strong suit because I turn it into fluff pretty quickly. I hope I at least managed to do _some_ angst, and I hope you like it.
> 
> (Yes, the title is from Wild Hearts again. Yes, I listened to the _entire album_ this time. Yes, I'm still a mess.)

Simon was hanging out in Nick’s basement with Nick, Leah and Abby when he got the call. It’d been an excellent day up till then. School had been let out early because of the snow, and they had been playing Assassin’s Creed and bombarding each other with popcorn for the better part of the last few hours. Waking up in Bram’s bed did help start the day right.

He was just relieving the blissful fifteen minutes they had spend trying to get out of bed, each of them pulling the other back as they tried to get up, when his phone rang. Abby was closest to it, so she picked it up, looked at the caller ID, shrugged and tossed it to Simon, who caught it deftly before picking up. “Simon Spier,” he said, by way of greeting.

“ _Mr Spier?_ ” an unknown voice at the other end of the line said, “ _This is Emory University Hospital_ – ” Simon’s blood ran cold. His mind immediately flashed to his parents, Nora or Alice. His parents and Nora had been visiting downtown Atlanta when the snowstorm hit; they had been planning on just staying there until it calmed down, but what if they’d decided to try it? Oh god, oh god, oh _God_.

“Simon?” Leah said, her voice filled with concern. Simon supposed he’d gone extremely pale. He waved in general to shut everyone up. Nick paused the game. Abby was staring at him intently.

“What’s going on?” Simon asked the lady.

“ _We’ve just had a car crash victim brought in, and you’re marked down as his emergency contact_.” Simon’s heart clenched, as the woman continued. “ _A Mr Abraham Greenfeld._ ” Simon let out an audible gasp. _Bram_. Simon had been sure Bram was fine, as he’d been heading over to his father’s this morning. He should’ve arrived before the storm.

“Oh my God,” he managed to choke out. “Is he – ?” He couldn’t bear to say it. His eyes were stinging, and he was losing feeling in his legs. His friends were sitting down around him, Leah putting her hand on his shoulder. Abby was holding her hands over her mouth, apparently holding her breath.

“ _He’s alive, he’s pretty banged up, but the doctors are confident he’s going to pull through.”_

Tears spilled over his cheeks as Simon’s relief broke over him. He sagged against Leah, who wrapped an arm around him. “Oh, thank God, thank _God_ ,” he finally said. “When can I come see him?”

The woman seemed to look something up for a moment. “ _The doctor says he’ll be finished with Mr Greenfeld in 20 minutes. You can come see him then._ ”

Simon looked at his watch. It was about a 15 minute drive up there, but in this weather... “Alright, I’m coming now. Thank you,” he said, automatically, because that’s what you did when someone gave you information over the phone.

His friends immediately talked over each other to get some answers. In the end, Leah was the one to make herself heard. “What’s happened?!” she all but yelled, causing Nick and Abby to fall silent.

Simon was shaking, already getting to his feet and looking thoughtlessly for his things. “Bram was in an accident.” The three of them gasped. “I need to go see him, _now_.”

“Simon, you can’t,” Abby protested instantly, walking over to him, pulling his bag out of his hands again.

Simon flared up at once. “My _boyfriend’s_ in the _hospital_ , Abby! I’m going to go fucking see him, right fucking now!”

“Don’t you start on her – ” Nick began, but Abby waved him off, apparently unfazed at Simon’s outburst.

“You’re fucking shaking, Si. There’s no way you can drive in this state.” She took his hand and gently guided him back to the couch. Simon only struggled a little, but both Nick and Leah were showing signs of wanting to stop him going. “You need to calm down first.” She sat down next to him and wrapped his arms around him. Leah joined in, and then Nick wrapped the three of them in a giant bear hug. Simon had never felt so sheltered and at the same time so trapped in his entire life. The warmth of his friends’ embrace and the knowledge that they were there for him, finally broke him. Huge, ugly sobs wracked his body as tears spilled down his cheeks, and his brain went through all the horrible things that could be wrong with Bram. Or could still go wrong. The lady had said he was stable, but Simon had seen enough medical shows to know that stable did not mean “out of danger completely and sure to recover”.

Abby and Leah were both rubbing his back. They didn’t say it was going to be okay. They didn’t say anything. And honestly, Simon didn’t know if he could’ve handled them trying to calm him down. His _boyfriend_ was in the hospital. Simon had honestly never been more scared in his life. After ten minutes of ugly-crying his eyes out, he felt exhausted and dried up. He was still scared, but no more tears would come. Abby, Leah and Nick slowly unwound themselves from him, and Nick rose to his feet. “Alright, Si. I’m going to ask my father to drive us up there. No way you’re driving us anywhere whilst you’re this worried.”

“’Us’?” Simon said, confused, as Nick ran up the stairs.

Leah let out a small laugh. “Of course, Si. We’re coming with you.”

At a loss for words, he stared at her and then at Abby, who nodded with vigour. “I have the best friends in the world,” he choked out in the end, and hugged the pair of them again.

Nick came thundering down the stairs again with his father in tow. Mr Eisner asked a few short questions about the situation, put a hand on Simon’s shoulder and smiled encouragingly. “It’s going to be alright, son. I’ll take you there.”

And after gathering up their things, the four of them followed Mr Eisner up the stairs and out into the snow, which had finally stopped falling.

\----

The ride to the hospital was excruciating. They had to drive about twenty miles below the speed limit for half of it, since the suburb roads hadn’t been shovelled yet. Simon was going out of his mind with worried. He’d already called his parents, to whom he’d sobbed the story, and who promised to get to the hospital as soon as they could get out of their hotel. Then he’d called Alice – for the first time in a very long time, he felt like he needed his big sister.

“Oh Si, I’m sorry,” Alice sighed out, after Simon had explained the situation (without completely breaking down this time). “But the nurse said he’s stable, right?”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean anything!” Simon said in desperation. “There could be complications, or internal bleeding, or something they missed, or – ”

Alice cut across him, “Before you spiral out of control, bub, please remember that this is the best hospital in Atlanta – I went there to get my tonsils removed, remember? I hardly felt a thing afterwards and they gave me so much ice cream I got nauseated!” Simon had to laugh despite himself. He remembered it well. Alice had been feeling so well after the surgery that she’d eaten a little more ice cream than was strictly necessary, and had gotten promptly queasy. She hadn’t eaten ice cream for a few months after that. “Look, Simon, I’m not gonna pretend nothing _can_ go wrong. But the doctors are optimistic, and that means you should be, too, until told otherwise. Alright?”

Simon smiled, and amazingly, optimism welled up inside him through all the worry and misery. “Thanks, sis,” he said. They turned on the hospital parking lot at that moment. His stomach lurched. “We’re here. Gotta go.”

“Give me updates, okay? I love that little weirdo.” He could hear a fond smile in her voice.

“Me, too,” Simon said. “Love you, Alice,”

“Love you, too, bub.”

He hung up, and scrambled out of the car, almost face-planting in the full feet of snow outside. Nick yanked him back by the hood of his sweater just in time. “Alright, let’s go,” Mr Eisner said, and they all made their way to the hospital as quickly as possible.

Inside, Simon ran to the information desk. “Hi, my name is Simon Spier, I’m here to see Bram Greenfeld,” he said quickly to the nurse, who checked her computer.

“Yes, Mr Greenfeld is in room 224. Straight up there, take the elevator to the second floor and straight on till you meet the end. He’s been asking for you.” _That meant he was awake_. Simon exchanged relieved glances with his friends, and thanked the nurse.

Simon, followed closely by Leah, Nick and Abby, practically ran to the elevator, and punched the ‘2’ button all the way up to the second floor. Walking faster than strictly appropriate in a hospital, they went down the corridor until they hit the final room. 224. Simon stood in front of it, his stomach churning. He wanted to go in so badly, but he was afraid of what he might see. Of what state Bram might be in. Nick put his hand on his shoulder. “We’re with you, buddy.”

Simon nodded, took a deep breath, and pushed open the door.

Bram was lying on the hospital bed, covered by a blue sheet and tubes running from both his arms. His heart beating in his throat, Simon approached the bed carefully, afraid to come closer, but dying to all the same. He stopped right at the edge of the bed, staring down at Bram’s face. Bram’s eyes were closed and he was breathing deeply and easily. He was obviously asleep. He also looked terrible. His face was littered with cuts, both large and small. His hands were resting on the covers next to his body, both wrists were heavily bandaged. Simon could scarcely think about the rest of his body.

Very slowly, Simon reached out and gently took Bram’s hand in his own. The hand was warm, which gave him slightly more hope in the whole situation. He looked back to see his friends lingering by the door, obviously giving Simon the space he needed.

The touch seemed to rouse Bram. His fingers tightened around Simon’s hand first, and then the rest of his body started to move. “Simon?” Bram said, his voice impossibly small, and Simon’s heart broke all over again.

“ _Bram_ ,” he breathed, and dropped to his knees besides the bed, taking Bram’s hand in both his own and pressing his lips to the back of it, “I’m here, baby. I’m here, it’s me.”

“ _Simon_ ,” Bram’s eyes blinked open, and he turned his head to look at Simon, smiling, then winced, “what happened?”

“You were in a car crash. They called me about an hour ago. Baby, I was so worried,” Simon said, kissing the back of his hand again, clenching his eyes shut against the tears threatening to spill over again.

Bram squeezed his hand once more, exhaling slowly. “Oh, Si, I’m so sorry, I never meant to cause you any worries.” Slowly, he lifted their entwined hands and pressed a kiss to Simon’s hand as well. Feeling Bram’s soft lips to his skin was like a shot of pure happiness for Simon. His shoulders relaxed (he hadn’t even realized he’d been so tense), the knot in his stomach unravelled, and his heart stopped racing.

He stood up quickly, and sat down on the edge of the bed, lifting his hand to brush Bram’s hair from his forehead. God, he loved this boy so much. He smiled, and Bram’s face split in an equally bright smile. Simon leaned down, his lips meeting Bram’s in a careful but nonetheless passionate kiss. His fingers kept stroking Bram’s hair. “How you feeling?” he asked softly. He didn’t straighten up, but just pulled back far enough so they could look at each other.

Bram laughed, and immediately winced. Bram’s eyes widened, startled, already looking for the alarm button. Bram’s hand shot out to grab Simon’s, bringing it back to rest on the covers. “Like I’ve been run over by a truck.” Bram’s heart clenched for him, he wished could take the pain away. Bram Greenfeld was the purest human being on earth, and did not deserve this pain. He himself would happily take the pain if it meant Bram would be okay again.

“I brought people,” Simon said, with half a smile, and straightened up to look at Leah, Nick and Abby, who were still standing by the door, looking uncertain whether or not they could intrude on what was obviously a very intimate moment.

Bram’s face split in a huge grin. “Hey, guys!”

The three of them took that as a sign they were welcome to enter the room further. “Hey, Bram, how are you?” Leah said, as she came to stand besides Simon, who was still sitting on the edge of the bed holding Bram’s hand. He was determined not to leave this spot until Bram was discharged.

“Do you remember what happened at all?” Abby asked, as she and Nick went to stand on the other side of the bed. Bram and Nick even did the lame cool-guy handshake. Simon’s heart lightened even further. Bram seemed more fine than his exterior suggested.

Bram’s smile faded a little, and he looked at the ceiling, a look of concentration on his face. “It’s all a little hazy, to be honest. I was driving back from my dad’s, because he told me to get back before the storm. I remember realizing I should’ve just continued on, and stayed with him until the storm passed, but I selfishly wanted to be back here so I could spend our free days with Simon.” Bram blushed deeply as he looked at Simon with a small smile. Simon pressed another kiss to Bram’s hand. “Then – it was snowing so much I could hardly see. I thought I was almost near the Waffle House, so I thought maybe I could stay there till this all died down a bit. Maybe call Simon. And then...I don’t know what happened. I think I slipped on some frozen snow, shot into the wrong lane and got hit by another car. Oh God,” His eyes widened, “What happened to them?” he asked, his voice suddenly pained, his face full of distress.

Simon put a hand on Bram’s shoulder to stop him from trying to get up. “I don’t know. We can ask a nurse when they come to check on you.” Bram lay back in his pillows, looking supremely unhappy. His free hand grabbed the hand on his shoulder, and he held on tight. His eyes were suddenly full of tears.

“I never should’ve gone back. I was stupid and selfish, but I just wanted to spend time with you and...I’m so sorry,” he said, his voice breaking on the last words.

Simon shook his head, squeezing Bram’s hands softly. “Shhh, shhh, it’s okay,” he said softly. His own eyes burned with fresh tears. He blinked them away furiously. “It’s okay, baby, we’ll fix it.” Bram was full-on crying now, his eyes clenched shut and sobs shaking his whole body. Leah and Abby each had a hand on an arm, rubbing soothingly. “Please, Bram,” Simon whispered, leaning forward and pressing his forehead to Bram’s, “Please, don’t cry. What can I do? Please, tell me what can I do? Let me help you. Please.”

Bram pulled one hand free to put on the back of Simon’s head, and the two of them breathed each other in for a while. Bram seemed to calm down a little, his body still shaking, but his sobs coming less frequent. “I love you,” Bram whispered, opening his eyes to look at Simon, “I can’t bear the thought I might’ve never seen you again.”

Simon’s stomach clenched painfully. “I’m here, you’re here,” he whispered, pressing a firm kiss to Bram’s forehead, “We’ll be fine.”

“You guys are disgustingly cute,” Abby said, which broke the emotionally charged atmosphere and caused everyone to laugh, even Bram, though he paid for his beautiful laugh with a stab of pain, causing him to wince. “Oh my God, I’m sorry, Bram!”

“That’s fine, it was worth it.” He took Abby’s hand in his and squeezed it tightly. The other hand was still firmly in Simon’s hand; it seemed unlikely they would ever let go.

The door behind them opened, and a nurse entered the room, directly followed by Mr Eisner, Bram’s mom, and finally Simon’s parents and Nora.

“Bram!” exclaimed his mother, and she ran to his side.

Reluctantly, Bram and Simon let each other go in favour of his mom getting to fuss over him for a while, so Simon turned his attention instead to his family, who had rushed over her at a moment’s notice. He loved them so much. Nora was the first to reach him, flinging her arms around his neck. “Is he okay?” she asked softly. Simon nodded against her shoulder, so grateful to have her with him in one piece. Before the emotion of Bram’s accident had overwhelmed him, he had been so worried about her, and the rest of his family. “Are you?” Nora continued shrewdly, and Simon laughed, more tears threatening to fall.

“Yeah, sis, I’ll be fine. Just...really rattled.”

“We all are,” his mom said, replacing Nora and holding Simon very tightly for a moment.  “What happened?”

Simon told the story Bram had shared quickly. His parents kept shooting glances at Bram, who was still in discussion with his mother, who seemed to be upset that _she_ hadn’t been called first.

Come to think of it, it _was_ pretty weird that the hospital hadn’t called her. That _he_ had been Bram’s emergency contact. What had Bram been thinking?

They seemed to resolve their issues fast, however, and his mom made some room for the Spiers to check on Bram. “Hey, Bram!” Nora said, jumping on the edge of the bed to give Bram a hug. Nora and Bram had hit it off instantly, and whenever Bram hung out with the family, he and Nora were an unstoppable force of teasing and Charades. It warmed Simon’s entire being just seeing how well Bram got along with his family.

“Hey, pipsqueek!” Bram said, ruffling her hair, causing her to grumble. “Thank you for coming, Mr and Mrs Spier,” he continued to Simon’s parents, who smiled as they gave him quick hugs.

“Of course, Bram! How are you feeling?”

“Better every minute,” Bram said. His eyes locked with Simon, and Simon’s stomach did a summersault. With his family now at the scene, and Bram looking relatively better, he could feel the tension breaking. Bram didn’t look like he was about to die at any second, and was already shooting Simon glances that would need some explaining when they were _alone_.

The hubbub died down, and the nurse stepped forward to check up on Bram. “What happened to the other people? Are they okay?” Bram asked him, voice anxious. Simon immediately flitted to his side, taking his hand. He squeezed it for good measure, sending a clear message; he was here for Bram. Whatever happened next.

“They were lucky,” the nurse said kindly. “They hit you full frontal, and they had airbags. They are a little rattled and will have some bruises here and there, but other than that, they’re fine.”

Bram relaxed visibly. He let out a shaky breath, and looked up at Simon with bright eyes. Simon pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Told you,” he said softly. Bram squeezed his hand in reply.

“They’re mostly worried about you. They saw you slip, and know you did everything you could to get out of their lane.” The nurse shone a light in Bram’s eyes, and seemed pleased with the results. Bram smiled in relief, a lone tear leaking from his eye, which looked pretty dramatic. Simon loved him so much.

“So what is, like, physically wrong with Bram?” asked his mother, beating Simon to the punch.

“Sprained wrists, bruised ribs, and broken leg. A clean break, nothing too difficult to hea.. Some cuts and bruises here and there. You got pretty damn lucky, kid.” The nurse put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed good-naturedly.

“Thank you,” Bram said earnestly.

“Mrs Greenfeld, we need to go over some details, do you feel up to stepping outside for a moment?”

Bram’s mom nodded, forgetting to correct the nurse on her name, pressed a kiss to her son’s temple, and turned to Simon. “Thank you, Simon. For being there for my boy. I know it can’t have been easy, being the first to see him like this. I’m just so grateful for you.” Then she did something she had never done before; she wrapped him in a hug. Surprised, Simon put his arms around her as well. He had never gotten the impression Bram’s mom was that fond of him; they certainly had never gone much further than the cursory ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’. When she left the room, Simon looked back at Bram, who was staring after his mom with raised eyebrows.

“Wow,” Simon said.

“Yeah.” Bram laughed. “That’s a damn breakthrough.”

Simon laughed as well, and retook his place at Bram’s side, while Leah, Nick, Abby, Mr Eisner, Simon’s parents and Nora flocked closer around Bram’s bed. They spent a few minutes talking and laughing with each other, and while Bram was engaged in every part of it, Simon could see him becoming tired of so much activity.

Luckily, the nurse and his mother returned soon after, and the nurse announced that visiting hours were over, and everyone needed to go. Bram looked distraught. “Wait,” he said, grabbing Simon’s hand tightly, “can Simon stay?” The nurse looked doubtful for a moment, and Bram continued. “I really don’t feel like being alone right now. Please.”

The nurse glanced at Bram’s mother. “Really, it’s usually only family who gets that privilege...”

But Bram’s mother smiled. “That’s quite alright.” She moved to the bed and kissed her son on the top of his head. “I’ll go home, and come back tomorrow with some of your stuff, Bram. What do you think of that?”

“Thanks, mom,” Bram smiled. He looked back over to the nurse. “Can Simon stay in her place?”

“And besides,” Bram’s mom continued, with a smile, “I’m too old to spend the night in that chair.” She nodded over to the single chair in the room. “I think Simon is still young enough to be able to pull that off.”

Everyone laughed, even the nurse, and in the end, he agreed, after getting a written permission from Bram’s mother ( _ugh, beaurocracy_ ).  After that, everyone said goodbye to Bram and Simon. Simon’s parents promised to pick him up some clean clothes and other stuff he would need tomorrow, and with a final hug and wave goodbye to Bram, they shut the door behind them, leaving Simon and Bram alone.

Simon looked down at Bram. He lifted a hand to rake his fingers gently through Bram’s hair. Bram closed his eyes and enjoyed the sensation for a long minute. “God, I’m tired,” Bram said, at last, and Simon nodded.

“Go to sleep, baby,” he said softly, “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

Bram’s eyes opened, his brown eyes locking with Simon’s. “I love you, you know.” He carefully rose a few inches off the bed and scooted over a bit, making room for Simon to properly sit and lie down as well.

“I know,” Simon said. He was pretty sure it wouldn’t be allowed, but nonetheless, he kicked off his shoes before swinging his legs onto the bed. The bed was softer than he’d expected it to be, and he scooted his body down until he was lying right next to Bram. Bram lifted his head and Simon snaked his arm underneath, creating a sort of pillow for Bram to put his head on. They stared at each other, one of their hands entwined, their fingers playing together between them. “I love you, too,” Simon whispered, as he kissed Bram’s forehead again. He felt Bram’s eyes fall shut, and soon enough, his breathing evened out. “Sleep,” Simon said softly, rubbing Bram’s hand with his thumb.

Simon stared at his boyfriend for a good long while after that, taking in every feature of his beautiful face. A few bruises were forming here and there, but other than those and the cuts, his face seemed pretty much unharmed. He wanted to kiss all of those cuts and bruises, wanted to kiss the pain away, and his heart clenched just thinking about the coming days, where Bram would have to stay in the hospital, driving him stir-crazy and possibly a little bitchy. Simon already felt for him, and it hadn’t even started yet.

Simon resolved to be there for Bram every step of the way. Anything and everything Bram wanted, Simon would make sure to (try and) get it. It was the least he could do to make up for the absolute honour of being his emergency contact person. Simon realized full well that if Bram hadn’t done that, Simon probably wouldn’t have found out about the accident until late next day. That probably would’ve killed him.

God, but Simon loved him. Possibly more than words could express. And he was going to make sure Bram knew that, for the rest of their relationship.

Simon felt the exhaustion of the rollercoaster day begin to set in, and slowly, his eyes closed. He drifted away into a dreamless sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked it, leave a comment! It may inspire me to write some more, which I would just love!


End file.
